As the New Year is upon us many of you may be thinking of “New Year’s Resolutions” … and I want you to know … this post is NOT about them.
You see, after finding I had an extraordinary high failure rate of making any progress with resolutions … I stopped resolving … because instead of making progress, I realized it just created a deeper cycle of more shame and self loathing.
A few years after figuring this out - I realized that leading from a place of restriction and shame (mine was always weight based … when I lose weight I’ll be happy, if I go to the gym 4x a week I’ll finally get in shape ... the list went on and on and on) … that I needed to lead from a place of d e s i r e.
Because you see - you can’t get what you want from a place of lack.
You have to go after what you want from a place of what you want (aka DESIRE) from a place from empowerment, desire and excitement. If it doesn't fit that criteria and come from a place that feels good - then you are just adding something else to your to-do list that you most likely won't do.
This is the basic blueprint:
1. Figure out what you want.
2. Get in touch with W H Y (Why do you want it? How will it make you feel? What will it nourish in your life?)
3. Go for it from a place of HELL YES! instead of obligation or because it’s something you “should” do. Because, ideally your goals should make you feel better about yourself, not worse, don't you think?
So many of us have been hardwired to believe that harder is better, but it's NOT.
And don't just take my word for it - get real with yourself for a second - how's your track record looking?
Has all the pushing, striving, obsessing over more obligations in your life led you what you want?
If it hasn't (and I'm guessing it hasn't) then it's time to reconsider your desires and time to revamp your relationship with how you get the results you want - it's time to approach your dreams and desires with a consistent process of pleasure.
It might seem contradictory, but pleasure leads to progress. And if there is one thing that you need to rewire in order to embrace and actually experience change you desire in your life - it's that it needs to feel good.
So keep it simple, keep it achievable. Get help if you know you need it. Seek out that thing that you're curious about but that pushes you into your edge. Honor your desires. Lighten up - find how to make making the dream as feel good now as you think it will when it happens.
Dedicated to your desires,